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#50DaysOfShades – Day 11 of 50 – Create the opportunity you are looking for.

Posted on 2022-06-062022-06-06 by Stephen Wells

#50DaysOfShades - Day 11 of 50 – Create the opportunity you are looking for.

I’ll admit I’ve picked a rough time to be doing the 50DaysOfShades. (Last time it was later in the year). For the 3rd day in a row it’s a pretty grim overcast sky, with absolutely no breaks today, not even the tiniest bit of the sun peaking thorough.

What does that mean for the daily photo?

Well in all honesty nothing. The photo will be (partly written before the photo) /was taken.

How I feel about it is a different matter.

Something inside of me wants lovely sunny photos, ones where I need to be wearing the shades. So there was definitely a heaviness in me today, constantly looking out the window is it going to brighten up etc.

And there comes the point of today's experience.

Awareness of what is around you, what you are looking for is great. (I generally cringe a little when people call it manifestation and law of attraction when it turns up).

If you are not looking for it, you will likely miss it when it is there and all intents and purposes it didn’t happen for you.

But if you are looking and you don’t see it (because it’s not there) what can you do?

Create the, an, opportunity. Yep it’s down to you.

It’s down to you to change the way you think/feel/react.

It’s down to you to take action, to do something that creates something. It may not be 100% what you wanted or envisioned, but will be something more than you currently have.

To create something that hopefully has a proportion of the attributes of your original concept, for me a photo with shades and a smile, but could just as easily be even further away (see yesterday’s grumpy photo).

So the questions for you today:

What can you create that looks something like what you want?

What actions can you take that will get you closer, if not fully there?

#create #ThinkFeelReact #takeaction #businesscoach #businesscoaching

#50DaysOfShades – Day 9 of 50 – Challenging your own outlook

Posted on 2022-06-042022-07-30 by Stephen Wells

Interesting one for me today. The photo has me wrapped up warm with my jacket on because it was ‘cold’

Well it wasn’t really cold, but I expected it, I felt it, I believed it, I convinced myself it was (going to be) cold. I’d collected my (faulty/partial) evidence and that was it. Cold it was going to be.

Basically it was a bit gloomy outside, it was also a bit blustery so the movement of air though the house had dropped the temperature a little.

So wrapped up and headed out to get my daily photo.

As soon as I shut the door there was an “ah, it’s nowhere near as cold as I thought it would be”

I hadn’t checked the outside thermometers (I’d moved them a couple of days ago an not put them back) so had no reality check on what it was ACTUALLY like outside.

I had jumped to the conclusion based on limited information.

As you can see from the 2^nd picture (that I set back up once I got home) it was actually peaking at 30°C outside in the sun, it just happened the wind was coming from the shady side of the house.

This is just a simple example (with no real consequences) of how only looking at one outcome and finding the evidence to support that outcome can lead errors of judgement.

Just check with yourself, Where do you look for evidence that supports you existing point of view? Are you avoiding looking for anything that will counter that view, or simply dismissing it if it is there?

Whenever you do something (that has real consequences) make sure you add a reality check that challenges your existing outlook.

#businesscoach #businesscoaching #realitycheck #challangeyourviews

#50DaysOfShades – Day 8 of 50 – Feral Working

Posted on 2022-06-032022-08-01 by Stephen Wells

#50DaysOfShades – Day 7 of 50 – Managing expectations

Posted on 2022-06-022022-07-30 by Stephen Wells

#50DaysOfShades - Day 7 of 50 – Managing expectations.

Today (2^nd June, Jubilee bank holiday) I went into town at lunchtime. I psyched myself up for it to be bustling to unbearably busy. Expecting for everything to take ages with some kind of bank holiday frenzy going on.

But there wasn’t, there were very few people in town, I was quickly in and out of the shops I needed to visit and even had to change the location I had considered for the photo to even get some people in the background.

It did however get me thinking on a tangent about expectations. Where we put those expectations on ourselves and others.

Several years ago I heard the phrase ‘lower your expectations to be happier’ or something along those lines. There are various articles about the concept i.e. Business Insider https://www.businessinsider.com/lowering-expectations-is-the-key-to-happiness-2014-8?r=US&IR=T / The Telegraph .

But the general premise is, if you have low expectations they generally get exceeded thus the outcome makes you happier.

However this has never sat very well with me especially when dealing with people. If you have to lower your expectations so low that there is a chance they will exceed them it does not feel to me like there is any point in that interaction. And that ‘no point in this’ made me sad.

That is where boundaries supersede expectations.

In my opinion we can be far happier setting and holding good agreed boundaries, than letting things slide and hoping people magically deliver.

Obviously this starts with oneself.

Learning to communicate what we are (and are not) going to do.

Ensure people are aware of what they CAN expect from us and make sure we deliver that.

Don’t leave them in a situation where they feel they need to lower their expectations of you/your ability/your work for them to be ‘happy’ with what you provide.

Communication and agreement (as always both personally and professionally) are the key.

#businesscoach #businesscoaching #expectations #boundaries #communicate #communication

#50DaysOfShades Day 6 of 50 – What resources do you have (to hand) that you are not using?

Posted on 2022-06-012022-07-21 by Stephen Wells

#50DaysOfShades - Day 6 of 50 – What resources do you have (to hand) that you are not using?

On my walk today it occurred to me that we all (personally and professionally) have a vast number of resource that we simply do not use. Be they skills, connections, equipment, spaces etc.
They are there, they could help (in part) resolve an issue we have, add joy to what we are doing or simply make what we are already doing easier/better.

The space behind me in the picture is a huge area of grass and wild flowers (as well as a large amount of duck/swan and goose poop and a model airplane runway) next to the river. And most people gravitate to the warn out strip close to the river that is rutted and devoid of grass.

I’ll hold my hand up to doing it too (some of the time) but today I made a conscious effort to walk across the grass. To take my sandals off and feel the grass and other plants beneath my feet.
To stop for a moment to notice how tall the daisy (type things, no idea if they are actual daisies) were. Then the buttercups and the little purple things between.

Then oh, ouch, ah the thistles that were hidden by the longer grass.

Even the thistles gave me a lesson, to pause a little to slow down, to look and appreciate everything that is around. To notice that rather than stomping along ‘because I’m out for a walk’ treading carefully and lightly can help get more, to relax more.

This space is just 10mins from my house, in the past I have ‘used’ it to go for a walk (as today) but more recently I have started using it as a route (albeit a longer route) to get to the supermarket. Rather than a few minutes in the car I get a 20-30 min walk (each way) some fresh air, some exercise and some downtime.

So I ask again,
What resources do you have (to hand) that you are not using? What have you forgotten about, are choosing to ignore or have avoided looking for, in your personal and professional life?

#businesscoach #businesscoaching #resources #wellness #noticing #takingaction

As always including the random pic I took while checking the photos as well as the 'good' pics.

#50DaysOfShades Day 5 of 50 – No Rules

Posted on 2022-05-312022-06-06 by Stephen Wells

#50DaysOfShades Day 4 of 50 – What are you doing?

Posted on 2022-05-302022-06-14 by Stephen Wells

#50DaysOfShades - Day 4 of 50

One of the questions I got a lot when I first did #50DaysOfShades back in 2015 had several people ask already here in 2022 is “What are you doing?”

As today’s photo was going to be nothing more than a walk by the river after my lunch (I changed it after starting to write this, to recreate my first pic from 2015 so that probably tells you something about me!) it gives me a chance to attempt to answer the question.

I say attempt to answer as when I first started posting the pictures (1^st July 2015 attached) I had ended the contract on my coworking desk at a local business centre, returned from a meditation retreat, and was sat in the park doing some work. And took a photo to add to Facebook It was going to say something like “My new office”.

At the time there were lots of 100 Days of gratitude and 30 Days of creativity kicking around, all of which felt, to me, to all be a little dry and forced. So in an attempt to be funny and do a little wordplay on the 50 Shades of Grey that was big a the time and possibly take the p*** a bit I added the description “Day 1 of 50 on the #50DaysOfShades” the photo. I’m not sure I had any intention of doing Day 2 in that moment.

But someone commented “50 days? You’re optimistic for a long Summer” to which I replied “I have plans” (Which I didn’t)

So I didn’t really have a clue what I was going to do, other than a photo in my shades that apparently I had now committed myself to! There was no idea of what it would look like, what I or anyone else would get from it, no research to prove it helped mental health or how challenging one’s own fears (I hated my photo being taken at the time) would add to personal development. Or how every year Facebook now shows you your memories and for 50 days I get reminded of everything I did in that time. (It’s actually hard to believe some of that stuff happened nearly 7 years ago now, seems like only yesterday for some of it)

So why am I doing it again now?

Well I turned 50 and it felt like a good time to do it, and to be a bit more on top of what I got out of it this time. There were lots of experiences that happened because of it, lessons about myself that I learnt etc that I never really shared at the time. Partly because they only became clear after but also because I didn’t want to define what I was doing, I wanted the freedom of “just post a photo, don’t think about it too much”, as I tend to overthink things.

This time there will be themes of the day (sometimes), bits of writing and some commentary from inside my head, reflections on and echos of what happened last time (such as people asking what I was doing? Hence todays ramblings)

IF (big if, no expectations, pressure, rules etc just post the photo and what day number you are on) you fancy playing along in your social media (fb/insta) feel free, use the tag #50DaysOfShades, and see what happens, how you feel, where it works and where you stumble. It would be great to have you along for the ride.

#Businesscoach #businesscoaching

#50DaysOfShades Day 3 of 50 – The old embracing the new

Posted on 2022-05-292022-06-14 by Stephen Wells

For today’s #50DaysOfShades (Day03) the theme is the old embracing the new.

Here I am sat in a 1957 Morgan, that was purchased by the chap sat in the driving seat in 1973 when he started a full restore while waiting for his new Morgan which had a 7 year wafting list at the time to be delivered. Guessing there was a different kind of chip shortage or something back then.

After several engines over the last 49 years when the last one was on it’s way out he bit the bullet and went for an EV conversion (running through the existing gearbox for those that are interested) as he was not going to be able to find a decent original replacement engine. It’s acceleration was phenomenal and has a range of around 150miles.

There were lots of conversations about is it right to put an EV conversion into a classic etc etc and what is the place of EV’s in general?

For me they have their place/usage scenarios and currently do not suit all use cases.

But as shown here have do have a place (even in classics) as it was not going to be ‘original’ with whatever he was going to be able to put in it. So why not embrace the latest available?

This does beg the questions;
How well do you embrace changes?
Do you adapt easily to new things?
And are your questions / doubts about change real or just inbuilt resistance?

If you want to see more of the car in question just search for Electric Morgan on YouTube as there is only one of them!

#businesscoach #businesscoaching #embracechange
#classiccars #classiccarsdaily #classicEV