A couple of days of just photos

One of the big questions about this project is explained in more depth on Day 4

A couple of days of just photos

One of the big questions about this project is explained in more depth on Day 4

There are many trains of thought around the good (for both sides) of being ‘in service’ to other people but that is not really what I am referring to here (although there is probably some overlap), it is literally that I took the photos for them.

Yesterday, with a very grey cloudy photo, I was jokingly accused of manifesting the weather and inflicted 50 days of shade on everyone. So, today’s photos had to be particularly sunny just for them (you know who you are!)

The other thing was for someone’s birthday. A friend (Carl Munson Professional Page, who I’ve currently only met virtually) had a double celebration this morning, firstly his birthday and secondly a year off the beer (just because he wanted to give it a go).

And to celebrate both a bunch of us joined him on his daily livestream and had a beer with him (at 9:30 this morning!)

Now it’s not normal (for me, or him, or anyone else that virtually joined in) to have a beer at 9:30 in the morning, but this was important. To congratulate him on his achievement, to create a ceremony (albeit a very small one of raise a glass with him as a community). This morning was only a few sips form the bottle, then it got recapped and back in the fridge until this evening.
Doing (or not doing) something consistently for a year takes effort.

Carl has put the effort in with both not drinking (for a year) and running the Good Morning Portugal livestream 5 days a week for way longer. And in doing the latter has developed a great resource and a fantastic community. It was an honour to be able to celebrate with him this morning.

Question:

How do you feel when you do things for other people?

#businesscoach #businesscoaching #beinservice #community

One of the big questions about this project is explained in more depth on Day 4

I didn’t really want to write anything today. Mainly because I was still pondering yesterday boundary topic and that I had to cut short what I wanted to say to fit the 2200-character limit on Instagram. I know there have been days when I’ve added a little bit extra into the first comment, but there was going to be too much. So, I stopped writing at what was both near the character limit and hopefully a relevant section to have made a point and ask the questions. (I’ll have to go back and check at some point and I’ll definitely write an expanded version on my website too).

Therefore, I took todays photo, hand up in the talk to the hand/no comment type pose. Both that and writing the above intro got me thinking about when we say or don’t say things.

Yesterday was definitely ‘I did not get to fully say what I wanted’. So, there is still more to be said.

Today, has obviously spiralled from ‘no comment’ to I’ve definitely got something to say around when we speak up, when we don’t, and when it may have been better not to!

Questions:

How does it feel when you don’t get to say what you want?
How does it feel when do you self-sensor?
How does it feel when you say more than is ‘appropriate’?
(and yes, ‘what is appropriate’ is probably another topic.

#businesscoach #businesscoaching #nocomment #moretosay

One of the big questions about this project is explained in more depth on Day 4

This one has been rattling around for a while as the temporary traffic lights have been there for a couple of weeks, only took that photo today but have been collecting other related images when out and about of the last week.

With the traffic lights in mind, even as children we are taught the importance of the red light, the stop sign. It becomes an unconscious act (hopefully) to notice it and respond to it. It is a boundary that is easy to understand, and we mostly have the expectation that others will adhere to it.

But I feel it’s always worth checking that the others have stopped. There is a quote along the lines of ‘There is a difference between knowledge and wisdom’. In this case have the knowledge others should stop, but the wisdom to check. And my lasting memory of this quote used a someone jumped the lights story to drive it home.

With this in mind, how we communicate our personal and business boundaries can create different result.

Do we just assume that something is understood, or do we reinforce/reiterate it when dealing with someone new, or someone we know in a new situation? Here the temporary lights are replacing an existing set that are damaged, but they feel the need to put a reminder sign up too. And this sign reinforces the ‘wait until green’ not ‘stop on red’.

The ’cyclist please dismount here’ is a polite request, I have no idea if there are penalties if you don’t.

But the ‘WARNING’ sign, No this (with a couple of reasons thrown in), no that, no the other. To me felt like demands, not warnings. Even to the point someone has taken offence (presumably) to the ‘no fishing, without a license’ line and scrubbed out the picture.

So even here we have three ways to express the boundary/set the expectation. Which I feel is worth bearing in mind when someone doesn’t hear/oversteps or deliberately confronts a boundary we have.
(that’s pretty much my 2200 characters)

Questions

How do you tend to state your boundaries?
Have you had situations where there was a misunderstanding about what the boundary was?

#businesscoach #businesscoaching #boundaries #expectations.

One of the big questions about this project is explained in more depth on Day 4

I have had a couple of days recently with just the photo, no post, no thoughts, no reflections on what the photo meant to me.

Today I want to make sure we have some reflections.

One of my reasons for redoing the #50DaysOfShades was to discuss the challenges that came up for last time. To share those experience (in retrospect) and hopefully help some of you overcome similar issues.

Those same challenges are not coming up this time round. They may surface at some point, but all the things I thought I would talk about do not feel relevant to what I am doing. So, they remain ideas but I don’t feel the need to weave them into a photo just so I can talk about them.

It feels more purposeful (at the moment) to share the thoughts that arise and speak to those.

When I think about reflection it’s not necessarily the context above of looking back (at what happened) but more the literal ‘what is looking back at me’.

This partly comes from various meditation/ mindfulness retreats where the phrase ‘Everyone is your mirror’ can be used to explore any emotional response you have towards someone.

The things that you see in someone else are/can be the things you see in yourself.
This concept works for both working within emotional responses (the stimulus is something you do/don’t want to exhibit yourself) and the unlocking of potential (if you can see it in someone else you can find it in yourself).

My use of the environment (my pictures) is me, in part, taking this to another depth. Having a whole extra set of stimuli to work with. I get to see, think, feel, explore things that otherwise would not have come to light.

Questions:

Do you reflect on the past, or are you trapped there?
(Now the curveball question)
What do others see in you that you do not see in yourself?

#businesscoach #businesscoaching #reflection

One of the big questions about this project is explained in more depth on Day 4

Today I deliberately went for a walk in the rain. T-shirt, shorts, sandals – no coat.

Why did I do that?

Partly so that I could Embrace it, Recognise it, Acknowledge it, Celebrate it, Appreciate it, Accept it. All the things I’ve been talking about over the last 34 days.

But mainly so that I could write/talk about it.

7 years ago on Day 26 of #50DaysOfShades 2015 (July 26^th 2015) it rained. It rained for the first time since I had started 50days that time round. All I posted was “I said I had a plan, not a great plan but a plan, take the photo anyway, even the swans were enjoying the rain”

What I didn’t talk about at the time was anything that came up for me at the time.

Well I’ve had 7 years to think about it, let’s see what I’ve got to say!

There are many phrases about the rain, but two stand out for me (in no order, I actually flipped a coin to see which one to put first, before anyone asks) :

a – “It never rains but it pours” - PROVERB

b - “Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning how to dance in the rain.” —Vivian Greene

These two ends of the spectrum (a) being doom and gloom, (b) encapsulating the brightness, stand out to me they both capture the energy/direction that you look at them from. And in reality it is usually something in the middle so why not embrace it?

Today it neither poured (it actually stopped as I was walking to where I took the photo, I was not happy at that!) nor did I dance in the rain. (I did however once go swimming in an outside pool that was closed in a hurricane! My 10year old logic was I was going to be wet anyway and what better time to practice snorkelling than when the pool was empty.)

Pictures: Me in the rain, the rain on the river, views from the back (half cloud/half blue sky) and front (all cloudy) of my house when I got back.

So just like when crossing the road, look both ways, before making a move.

Questions:

Which way do you normally look (without thinking)?
Next time could you look both ways?
Can you just embrace what is, without judging?

#businesscoach #businesscoaching #EmbraceIt #danceintherain

One of the big questions about this project is explained in more depth on Day 4

One of the big questions about this project is explained in more depth on Day 4